A comic book I bought came with a spell book. As I sat alone in my room, ravished by a new sense of power, I flipped through the pages and stopped when I came to the section on love. One of the spells read: "On a pink eraser [or rubber for the British equivalent], write the name of the one you love. Keep it with you at all times and make sure it is touched by no other." Excellent, I thought, my mum had just bought me a collection of erasers, one of which was strawberry-scented and pink! I took out a pen and I wrote his name in my neatest handwriting: Smarty. I then kissed the eraser and with great care put it in my Hello Kitty pencil case.
He had radiant sun-kissed hair that cropped his face. His eyes were as blue as topaz and as mesmerising as a hypnosis spiral. His smile was devilish and his cheeks constantly blushed with youth's energy. I was desperate to be noticed by Smarty.
It took less than 24 hours for the spell to work. That day, I was wearing a white loosely knit cardigan without a vest and I was worried that my classmates might get a peek of my developing breast buds. As I sat at a table along with six or seven other boys and girls, I was passed a note. On it, there was a question: "Will you go out with me?" This was followed by two boxes, one for yes and one for no. Smarty's name appeared at the bottom. My heart skipped a beat. I could feel my face flush. I looked around for any sniggering faces. Could this be a joke? The only face looking back at me was that of Smarty's. I ticked a box and passed the note back (it must have passed through two or three sets of hands before it reached Smarty). A contract was signed and it was official, Smarty and I were going out. The spell had worked and I had, for the very first time in my life, a boyfriend.
That was 20 years ago.
When I left England, I didn't keep in touch with Smarty. In fact, after our three-day relationship ended, we barely talked (as far as I can remember). Last year, when Smarty's name appeared on my recommended friend's list on facebook, I simply had to add him. We soon rekindled our friendship and I have been sleeping with him on and off since then.
He has greasy, mousey hair (his scalp currently being held together by five stitches on account of a fight he was involved in last weekend). His eyes are goggly. He has a goofy smile and his cheeks are regular cheeks. Both of his earlobes are stretched from piercings. He conch is pierced in two places, and he has a tongue ring and a labret. Tattoos cover his entire right arm and half his torso. He never finished school and he has atrocious grammar. This is Smarty now.
